Appreciate today's show. Listen to it. Go to www.thejaneellen.com and click on Hear Jane. I say that because in order to provide your daily dose of sarcasm and critique, and to feed our tremendous egos, Adam and I braved vertigo and the most intense migraine ever. Just sayin'.
We had little sympathy for Jon Gosselin who was complaining about his reality show while standing in front of his $1.1 million dollar home. Adam and I agree that if anyone deserves a reality show it's our Brien Travis (buy his CD immediately on iTunes and Amazon). The most amazing and amusing things seem to happen to him on a daily basis. He is oh-so-watchable.
Adam can predict the future. Just because he suggested it, Dakota Fanning is lining up to play the grand-daughter of Dorothy in an updated Wizard of Oz. It seems she will be more like Ripley from Alien. I don't know if that means she'll shoot a lot of stuff, but she won't need too much in the way of rescuing.
You may though, if you get the proposed Bob Dylan GPS. What a brilliant songwriter. But seriously, can you understand half of what he's saying? TomTom has the voices of Homer Simpson, Kim Cattrall, and Mr. T. We wondered if Mr. T. always pities the fool. Or if, in person, he's rather ambivalent.
Don't sit on a toilet seat without looking at it first. Because, I am assuming, that if the guy in Australia had, it wouldn't have become glued to his toosh. Not that it was his fault. But it took industrial solvents to remove it. It had to hurt. And be embarrassing too. Adam and I agreed that it was lame in the scope of practical jokes because the person who put the glue on the public toilet seat in the mall wasn't there in the stall when it happened. No pay-off.
Adam has an idea for our favorite comedy, The Happening. The sequel would be What's Happening. It writes itself.
Paula Abdul is hosting VH1 Divas on September 17. Oddly enough, two divas are former American Idols. Hello VH1, I could've so hosted that for you. Just putting that out there.
And then Adam and I had quite the discussion regarding cemeteries and burial and what-not. The crypt above Marilyn Monroe's is being sold for $4.6 million. Well, it has been bought for that already. It was originally meant for Joe DiMaggio and he sold it to the guy who is face down in it right now. He died 23 years ago. His wife is selling it, relocating her husband's remains to a plot she bought, and she plans to be cremated.
Make sure you troll the website. New column about roses from Jay Frankenfield is up. Along with my Tube Job and Eda's Hollywood Vine. If you are a Facebook fan, there is a now a The Jane Ellen fan page. Feel free to sign up by the thousands.